To Ellie from the past,

Congratulations on becoming a senior in high school. You must be feeling pretty mature, wise, and untouchable now that you are at the top of the food chain. Savor the taste, my friend, because being a freshman for the second time in my life was no easy task. Luckily for you, here are my five steps for surviving your freshman year at the University of Delaware, sorry for the spoilers. 

  1. Everything comes back to time management. Learning how to manage your time effectively will save you from unneeded anxiety. It may be stress inducing to see every chore for the day on a planner spread, but the high that comes with crossing something off the To-Do list is unbeatable. Quite quickly you will notice a major difference between life in high school and college: independence. But don’t get too excited yet. You experienced freedoms in high school that will be taken away in college. For example, roommates. Now that you live out of state, you can no longer see your boyfriend, friends or family every day. Instead, you will see the lovely faces of your sweet, caring, intelligent roommates… 24/7. Say goodbye to privacy. This is a blessing though, so be sure to embrace it. Don’t worry about not getting along. You will. Just be yourself and love each other for the diverse personalities and ideas that you all bring to every situation. And with this, be sure to keep each other in check. While it’s easy to be lured in by the constant parties, assignments pour in just as fast as alcohol down a frat boy’s throat. Soon, you’ll all come to understand this. And unlike high school, professors don’t hold your hand throughout the class. It is your responsibility to make yourself aware of the hundreds of assignments and complete them with perfect accuracy, or else you will be punished. Or so it feels like. This sounds unreasonable, which it is, because you’re not a machine. This is why the choices you make are so important. Find the balance between being the best student you can be and the best person you can be and I’ll be proud of you. 
  2. Go with the flow. Giving yourself adequate time to complete important tasks is crucial in maintaining academics, and is far different than living your life by a schedule. Be able to adjust to change, and stay flexible. Not only will this help you when the coronavirus pandemic hits (surprise!) but also will aid you as an important life skill. Professors can change the due dates on assignments just like an employer can move your shift. You have to be able to account for this and adapt, especially when the entire education system moves online and you are forced to evacuate campus. Be patient and considerate to those around you and they will lend you the same kindness. 
  3. Allow yourself to make mistakes. The grades you strive to maintain can be taken away with a single mistake. Don’t get me wrong, you should be proud of what you are able to achieve, but understand that a simple mistake does not mean you have failed your purpose in life. Learn from it. Figure out what went wrong and how you will fix it in the future. Also, recognize that some mistakes are worth making. The memories you create when you put aside your responsibilities for a few seconds and experience the world are the ones you will look back on with fondness. When you decide to cut your study session short to watch a movie with the rest of the floor, you are able to join in on key bonding moments with the new group of people you will soon see as your family in Delaware. But don’t let the fear of missing out keep you from being a productive student. Again, we see the need for balance, it’s difficult, I understand. You’ll figure it out with the support of those that want to see you flourish. 
  4. Appreciate the little things. When one part of your day goes wrong it’s easy to label the entire day as bad. And when more than one day is bad, suddenly the week is bad. This is just the recipe for hating your life. Be sure to let the serotonin in once in a while, laugh a little, open the window on a nice day, and let your friends help you destress. I remember my friend handing a pumpkin when I was having a mental breakdown. She told me to throw it down the stairs outside. I resisted, but I threw that pumpkin and then proceeded to meticulously pick up every pumpkin slice and wash the steps because I felt guilty. But laughing and crying there, in the moment, was liberating. Recognize people’s efforts to keep you happy and return this to them when they are feeling down. Be the end to someone’s streak of bad days. The shift to positivity does wonders for the mind. 
  5. Know your worth. I wish I could tell you that you’re special, and great things are in store for you, but I’m only Ellie from one year in the future. Right now, the only thing we are told to strive for is a perfect academic record. However, the grades you receive are not a perfect representation of the value of your mind. Your confidence is so easily influenced by outside factors. Getting a terrible grade, which you will get in chemistry so brace yourself for that, can make you question your entire purpose as a human being. How  can you reassure someone that everything will be okay when they do poorly on an assignment, but not believe it for yourself.  Just try to see the bigger picture. I can assure you that your purpose in life is not going to be getting a 100% on your next test. Your academic strengths will guide you to finding your passion in life. Don’t let yourself choose a path that doesn’t make you happy. If you haven’t figured it out, I just want you to be happy. 

Hopefully I didn’t scare you. You got this. 

  • The just as confused, but slightly more realistic Ellie

P.S.: Do NOT use the seaweed face mask, it turns out you’re allergic.