As I lay breathless and steady, the room fills with memories from the past and expectations of a future I will not get to see. The idea of a funeral is always so morbid, but it can be quite a beautiful thing to see everyone that has ever loved you gather together. It should be a celebration of the life that was lived, not what that person will miss. 

The memories saturate the walls of the room and I am jolted back through my 86 years of life. The good, the bad, and the many tough times, all flood my conscience. My attention is immediately drawn to the two people that were there through all of life. I hear that unforgettable laugh echo through the room and I see Hannah standing by the window laughing with Jane. My two best friends. They got me through the challenges of high school, the many mental breakdowns of college, and the scary concept of the real world. My most fond memory with them was my college graduation. From my family getting stuck in traffic to my name being mispronounced (as per usual), it seemed like nothing could go my way that day. But then I heard that laugh and I was brought to tears. They had driven nearly two hours just to watch me cross that stage. They were my world and for them to be there in that moment made the scary prospect of the future seem like nothing. Being able to see them together, laughing one last time made it easier to rest.

I then catch a glimpse of the people that I have worked with throughout the years and the people that now own my Physical Therapy clinic. When I see them the memories of all the doubt and questions that plagued me throughout my journey to a doctorate came rushing back. Am I enough? Will I make it? But luckily I pushed through and ended right where I wanted to be. Owning my own physical therapy clinic and having a beautiful family. I see the new manager and realize that he has my life works in his hands, but I realize there is nothing I can do.

My attention slowly shifts and I see all of the best parts of my life huddled together, sharing stories and finding solace in each other. I see my family, two beautiful granddaughters, three handsome grandsons, and my two daughters. My granddaughter seemed distracted by her significant other and I am thrown back into their beautiful wedding. She was the last of my grandchildren to get married but the day was just as special as the four that came before. It was a beautiful spring day and when I saw her bright smile beaming, I knew it could not get more perfect. Being able to watch them grow up has been the greatest gift I have ever been given. 

As I scan the room, one person is missing. The love of my life had passed away one year earlier, but now I get to see them once again. After traveling back through my life and seeing old friends my body is laid to rest and my soul is at peace.