In class the other day I asked who had ever seen their dad cry. To my suprise, many of the students in the class raised their hand. This was the exact opposite of what I expected to see. My entire life I grew up observing how my father suppressed his emotions, even through the death of his two best friends to cancer and his father. I never have really thought it to be normal to cry or show my emotions, and I find it very hard and uncomfortable to open up to people. After leaving class I was still curious and decided when I interviewed I wanted to focus on two questions. First I’d ask if the person had ever seen their dad cry, and the second I’d ask if they feel comfortable and find it easy to open up to others. 

For my interview I walked around the floors of my dorm and found people to interview. I found three guys and two girls. I wanted to include girls in my interview because I want to be able to compare the answers of the guys and the girls. The first guy I found was my friend Carter. When asked if he had ever seen his dad cry he responded, “Hell no”. Carter went on to explain he had never seen his dad shed a single tear, which was complete opposite of the next person I interviewed. My next interviewee, who was male, explained, “My dad has always made it clear, it’s perfectly acceptable to convey your emotions because we are all human”. My friend Katie shared a similar response along with my other female interviewee. Both have seen their fathers cry and be emotional. The last person I interviewed had a very strict father and claimed he was lucky if he got to see his father smile and laugh. 

For my next question, I found the answers were quite predictable. My friend Katie responded, “Having a father who isn’t afraid to open up, always ensured me as a child and even now that it is necessary to open up to friends and family”. The other two interviewee’s who had seen their dad cry had very similar responses. They felt it was acceptable and even necessary for your mental health to open up. Carter and the other guy I interviewed, who had never seen their father’s cry, felt the same way as me. They find it extremely hard to open up and find themselves bottling up their emotions. They don’t know how to open up or even who they would talk to if they wanted to. I have this problem as well. I have so many close people in my life, but I don’t feel comfortable opening up and I don’t want to burden them with my problems. 

I found from the interviews that parentage has a large impact on one’s ability to be willing to open up emotionally and share with others. Those who I interviewed who had fathers who were emotional found it easy to open up, while the opposite occurred for those who had fathers who never showed emotion. Parentage has a large impact, but recently, as we had talked about in class, social media plays a role as well. I found social media to have a more positive impact in this field however. Growing up I have seen time and time again on social media moments or examples of how it is perfectly normal for a guy to be emotional and open up and share. This is definitely a good thing, and I am optimistic about this problem. I think it is slowly changing and will only continue to get better!